[Kaldon]

Scored higher than expected on an IQ test, but that hasn’t changed the habit of staying quiet in meetings and social settings. People often misinterpret silence as confusion or lack of ideas, when in reality there’s plenty going on internally. Words don’t come out until something feels worth adding. Is this a common experience for others with higher IQ scores, or does this sound more like an introvert trait taking the lead?

[devora]

Looking back at the early days of my career, there was a pattern that I didn’t fully understand at the time. Meetings would happen, problems would be discussed, and I’d sit there quietly while everyone else tossed ideas around. The truth was, I had plenty to say, but most of it stayed inside.

There was one project in particular where the team was stuck on a technical issue for days. I had a possible fix in mind early on, but I didn’t bring it up right away. Part of it was waiting to see if someone else would arrive at the same conclusion on their own. Part of it was not wanting to seem like I was trying to outshine everyone. So I just listened.

When I finally mentioned the idea near the end of a meeting, the lead looked at me and asked, “Where was that suggestion two hours ago?” There wasn’t a simple answer. It wasn’t about being shy or unsure. It was about weighing whether the timing and the delivery would make the idea land the way it should.

Over time, I’ve realized that the quiet approach has its costs. People might assume there’s nothing going on behind the silence, when actually there’s a lot. But changing that habit hasn’t been easy, because speaking up just to fill space still doesn’t feel right.

[Author]

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